Nobody wants to listen
Sadness reigns as I see the diminishing ears of people in our present time. Humans are getting more aggressive in voicing their own ramblings. Rather than listening to one another, we throw volley of snippy retorts complete with accompanying profanities. Major differences are oftentimes settled in damaging verbal dispute which leaves both parties pierced through the heart.
Communication has become one-sided these days. Everybody talks and no one cares to listen. Despite the countenance of silence most people display, their thoughts are ruminating on the next words that will lash out of their mouths. Each is obstinate with their opinion of things, each believes in the veracity of their arguments and all are confident with the correctness of their judgment. Consequently, people have abandoned the very essence of communication.
Has listening become inappropriate anymore? I hope not. Still, everywhere I look I see exchange of deafness. Husband goes deaf in the form of stonewalling while wives go deaf with incessant complaints. Parents are unable to hear their child because their ears are muffled with authority. Leaders tend to not hear the bigger issues because their pride is drumming noisily on their thoughts. In every exchange I encounter, seldom do I see a person who truly listens. Most are eager to launch their say on issues without even listening to the thoughts of the other party. This foolish attitude scratches the harmony of relationship which we should extend to our self and to our kind.
There is much wisdom to be learned if we allow our self to be still and lend our ears for a while. Conflicts and misunderstanding should have never been if people let go of their deafening condescension and truly hear what others have to say. It does not matter who is right or wrong, listening without judgment unburdens each of the feeling of being unheard. Humans need attention, and when deprived we tend to make noise. If we all focus on making noises, how can we come up with a resolve?
Be it professional, mutual, intimate or casual relationship, much of its harmony rest on the capacity of each to extend themselves thru listening. Unfortunately, attentive listening has been considered a drag; today’s practice favors impromptu response rather than reciprocal exchange of emphatic silence. Our media are overflowing with examples to justify this damaging human trend, and the disturbing reality is we are actually patronizing this foolish display of decadence.
Why are we having conflicts? Why must people shout their despair by means of violence? Why must there be war in order to be heard? Why must nature be violent in reminding us of our vulnerability? Couples end in devastation, friendship fell in misunderstanding and trust ends in betrayal. Does anyone bother to find its true cause?
If only we could listen there would be much to learn. Perhaps we could learn the uniqueness of others, or learn the pain of our loved ones, or learn the feelings of people who rely on us, or learn the reason of our miseries and misgivings, or learn the cause of our errors, or the learn the true cause of nature’s vengeance upon man, and more importantly, maybe we can learn who we really are deep inside.
Unfortunately, listening had been steered to inappropriate use. Much to my disappointment we pay more attention to activities which deteriorates our growth. Who does not love to hear of senseless gossip, or the circus showbiz, or confusing politics, or unethical debates, or chauvinistic shows or depressing news? How very attentive we are in hearing what happens to who when we gossip; how excited we are to hear the latest buzz in the showbiz arena; how eager we hear the political stand of our favored politicians; how we gleefully we absorb the arguments in damaging debates; how we love to hear the drama of our favorite shows and how we hear depressing news.
Much of the questions in life some are searching, yet they cannot find. If man can only listen, the answer is right before him. Are your listening?
“The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.”
— Ralph Nichols
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By izzat aziz on November 20th, 2009
i notice that, in writing in speech people tend to give and give without give option for other people even to ask about it.
it really become one way and it absolutely boring – we live in web 2.0 la.
izzat aziz´s last blog ..Serial killers that waiting to kill your blog
[Reply]
Walter Reply:
November 21st, 2009 at 6:47 pm
I also notice what you’ve observed Izzat. One way communication is indeed boring.
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By Ideas With A Kick on November 20th, 2009
Hmm… now this post got me thinking. I thinks as all things, communication needs to be win-win for it to be effective. It’s partially the job of the speaker to provide value by what he says, to get the other person to listen. And partially the job of the other person to be open minded and to seek the value in what she hears, to become a more profound and attentive listener.
Eduard
Ideas With A Kick´s last blog ..Forget achieving life balance and try this instead
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Walter Reply:
November 21st, 2009 at 6:50 pm
I agree with your thoughts. Communication needs to be two way in order to be effective, one hears as the other talk then the other way around. This is win-win situation.
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By Michael Holmes on November 20th, 2009
Listen?? Who wants to listen? We want to be heard darn it!!
I personally think listening is the best thing we can do to a person…or for a person. In fact, I heard someone say, “listening has made me a better speaker.” And I can agree. Listening has made me a better everything (trust me I need to be better
)
Great post
[Reply]
Walter Reply:
November 21st, 2009 at 6:54 pm
We will learn a great deal if we start to close our mouths, shut our judgments and arbitrariness and listen to others. We all have thoughts to share and we can experience these others’ thought through listening.
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By Sandesh on November 20th, 2009
People will listen to a certain extent and once the limit has been reached then most of them give a deaf ear.
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Walter Reply:
November 21st, 2009 at 6:57 pm
Listening does have limits, but people tend not to reach–even close–to the limits. These people cannot withhold the tendency to speak.
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Joey Reply:
November 22nd, 2009 at 6:49 pm
I guess that means there is GREAT opportunity for whomever is willing to listen first! Hmmm… this sounds like something I’ve heard before.
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By John Paul on November 20th, 2009
Nice Post, I learned a long time ago, from my grand mom to listen to people, you will always learn something.
The reality is the more you listen to someone the more remembered you will be. Most people think to be remembered they need to be the one Always talking.
John Paul´s last blog ..Top 15 Firefox Plugins To Make You A Better Blogger
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Walter Reply:
November 21st, 2009 at 6:59 pm
Loud people are ignored most of the time. And silent listening draws attention. We will never forget the person who listens to our ramblings.
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By Tomas Stonkus on November 20th, 2009
Hey Walter:
All I have to say is that I am glad I discovered your blog. I am guilty of this. I am guilty of not listening and being selfish. Sometimes I do get a grip on myself and actually listen to people talk. Yet, sooner or later I would stop listening.
Maybe it was because I felt like nobody else wanted to listen to what I had to say.
Maybe that is the root of our problems: nobody takes the first step and keeps going for long enough to show other people the way into different more meaningful interactions. Maybe, it’s just we lack leaders. The society has been so centered on selfishness, fulfilling our own needs, that we were conditioned to neglect other people.
We may not be doing that consciously, but I believe we need to wake up and become aware of our own wrongdoings.
Maybe the reason why we stopped listening is because people don’t like to take responsibilities anymore. Listening to gossip shows, business news, etc puts no responsibility on us. We are not forced to do anything about those issues.
However, when we listen to what people close to us say, then usually we have to do something about it, we have to an action. Most people are “too busy” for that. They rather listen to useless crap as opposed to taking that time to listen what matters.
Thank for this article as it reminded me to start listening and stop talking as much. Maybe it is time for people who are aware of these issues to show they way and start taking responsibility. Be the change you want to see in the world? Yup, the best advice anybody could have given. Let’s follow it.
Best,
Tomas
Tomas Stonkus´s last blog ..Get Rid of Negativity Once and For All
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Walter Reply:
November 21st, 2009 at 7:07 pm
Life communicates with us. It tells us something that we must abide. But instead, we make loud complaints about our situations. By keeping our minds quiet, we will hear the wisdom that we should follow.
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By S.Pradeep Kumar on November 20th, 2009
Really nice quote by Ralph Nichols!
Actually who is he?
S.Pradeep Kumar´s last blog ..40+ Websites For Copyright And Royalty Free Photos 
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Walter Reply:
November 22nd, 2009 at 1:47 am
Ralph Nichols, former member of the Lettermen, has one of the finest singing voices and entertaining styles in the business. A veteran of both The Sandpipers of Guantanamera fame, and The Lettermen.
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By Zeenat{Positive Provocations} on November 20th, 2009
Walter,
Zeenat{Positive Provocations}´s last blog ..Being Alive{Inspirational Quote} 
Youre so so right. Noone wants to truly listen…everyone needs to be heard. It gives one a sense of validation.
In my profession{counseling psychologist} I need to be the listener which is fine.
But even on personal level..i find people want to be heard, and i listen, but then…who is hearing me??? I wish all people really listening to the answer of the question we ask so often “How are you?”!!
How often we ask this question..and how often are people honestly replying…or expecting an honest reply?
This is an awesome topic. Thank you fro broaching this subject.
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Walter Reply:
November 22nd, 2009 at 6:04 pm
Our world is full of conflicts because everybody wants to be heard but nobody wants to listen. It’s amazing how much one can learn if he/she truly lends his/her ears.
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By Nadia - Happy Lotus on November 20th, 2009
Hi Walter,
I am often amazed at how people do not listen to one another. My friends joke that I am psyhic but I am not…I just really listen to whomever I am talking to at the moment.
Every one these days seems so absorbed in themsevles, they just do not seem to care about others. I think fear and sadness has just become so “normal” that people forget that it is not so supposed to be like that.
The irony is that many people want to be heard but they forget that the best way to be heard is to listen to someone else. When we truly starting listening to one another we will then begin the road to healing. We are all on this planet together so we just need to get along and listening is how we start.
Nadia – Happy Lotus´s last blog ..The Happy Lotus Diaries Begin – Please Share Your Thoughts
[Reply]
Walter Reply:
November 22nd, 2009 at 6:13 pm
My friends also think I’m a psychic.
People are funny, they talk but are not listening to what they are saying. Oftentimes, you will read people by just listening to them. True listening beckons wisdom. 
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By Ryan on November 20th, 2009
Walter,
Listening is The Lost Art. Anybody can talk at a person; few talk to a person.
How can we be better listeners? By thinking about others first. You can only help people when you know what they need help with. This is accomplished by hearing their message before you broadcast yours.
Another excellent post buddy
Ryan´s last blog ..How To Market Your Internet Business: A Beginner’s Approach 
[Reply]
Walter Reply:
November 22nd, 2009 at 6:07 pm
Not listening can be rooted on our own selfishness. You are right Ryan, we should think about others thru listening. If people act in this kind of reciprocity, understanding will commence.
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By Steven on November 20th, 2009
Hey Walter,
great post as always, pointing out the truth and all.
I’ve always noticed this as well. I’ve just thought that when people communicate with each other, they almost never focus on the content in which they exchange, but rather, they focus mostly on the “states” they are in.
Great post, great idea. Gave me a lot to think about, thanks Walter.
Steven
Steven´s last blog ..Comic Lesson #6 : Don’t Be Afraid to Give and Love
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Walter Reply:
November 23rd, 2009 at 6:29 pm
Thanks Steven. Listening has been neglected by many, consequently, it engenders misunderstanding.
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By Kelvin Kao on November 20th, 2009
I think sometimes it’s like you are at a bar, or a noisy restaurant. The environment is loud, so to be heard, you have to be louder. And when you are louder, other people also raise their volume to be heard. And then everybody just got lost in the yelling and nobody can actually hear anything.
Kelvin Kao´s last blog ..Puppetry Classes
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Walter Reply:
November 23rd, 2009 at 6:31 pm
In ordinary environment people get loud with their ego, such results in deafness to the voice of others.
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Financial Samurai Reply:
January 2nd, 2010 at 10:28 am
This is a great analogy! One shouting over another to get heard, and suddenly nobody hears anything b/c it’s too loud!
Listening is a skill that really does take discipline and patience to learn.
Financial Samurai´s last blog ..Let “Freement” Reign! Spending Paralysis, Material Lust And Obsession
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By Emily Jane on November 20th, 2009
Yours is by far my favourite blog, always so well written, well thought out and well communicated. I find it interesting that times have moved toward a way of living where being seen and heard equates success – the world defines greatness in terms of power, possessions, prestige, and position. If you can demand service from others, you’ve arrived. In our self-serving culture with its me-first mentality, listening and serving isn’t exactly the most popular attitude – which is saddening, as this mentality contributes to the downfall of us as a species. I always endeavour to listen and help others – maybe just because speaking and being the centre of attention isn’t my forte, but wouldn’t the world be a better place if we all took the focus off ourselves for a second, and actually listened to each other?
Emily Jane´s last blog ..No French Pirates
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Walter Reply:
November 23rd, 2009 at 6:36 pm
Sad indeed is the plight of mans deafness. The truth is I fear our future; with all the nuclear glory of man he can permanently silence the existence of man. If our leaders don’t start to listen, mankind will suffer a gloomy future.
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By Heather Kephart on November 20th, 2009
I think that maybe people are afraid to be wrong, because to be wrong leaves you vulnerable. People are also afraid to be wrong because it shakes them to their very core and makes them question everything they’ve come to believe in. If we are wrong, we fear we will no longer be taken seriously, and that years of work building credibility will be dashed in an instant.
That said, I love it when people admit that they are wrong. It often steps their credibility up in my eyes.
I can almost always see both sides of an issue. Sometimes I err on the side of wishy-washy. I envy people who know their own mind and can take a firm stand. But you are right, sometimes one can take too firm of a stand.
And silence, it is unheard of these days. We’re supposed to be multitasking. It’s burning up our reserves, thinning out our potential, hiding us from ourselves. But perhaps that is the payoff we are seeking.
Heather Kephart´s last blog ..Monday Mischief
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Walter Reply:
November 23rd, 2009 at 6:49 pm
Accepting our vulnerability and mistakes takes a lot of courage, many interprets this as a sign of weakness when in fact it is a manifestation of strength. Great people I know have done many errors in their life, but instead of being adamant with self-righteousness, they accept their errors and learn from it.
Only a fool will claim perfection.
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By Paul on November 20th, 2009
Walter,
the title of your post ‘Nobody wants to listen’, perhaps ‘Nobody knows how to listen@ might be more appropriate.
Listening skills aren’t something that are taught in schools. The higher level listening skills required for meaningful and useful conversation to take place. These skills allow both parties to fully understand the others point of view.
Learning these skills may be a step in right direction towards ending some of the troubled discussions we have each day!
http://www.diary4life.com/the-value-of-quality-communication/
Regards
Paul
Paul´s last blog ..How do you express yourself?
[Reply]
Walter Reply:
November 23rd, 2009 at 6:53 pm
Thanks for the suggestion Paul. The truth is it took me time to put on the “right” title but then I guess the content will speak of itself.
Listening skill is a part of personal growth, we should master this virtue.
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Shari Weiss Reply:
March 3rd, 2010 at 1:09 am
One of the lines in this post that really resonates with me is this one: “There is much wisdom to be learned if we allow our self to be still and lend our ears for a while.”
And, Paul, you are right. People just don’t know what it means to really listen, i.e., to quiet their own concerns and be open-minded and focused.
As a Business Communication teacher at San Francisco State, the first day of class always began with Three Rules to Success. The FIRST and probably most important was to LISTEN CAREFULLY. And then we would have actual activities to teach listening skills.
Shari Weiss´s last blog ..What’s the ROI on Blog Comments, Anyway?
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By askcherlock on November 20th, 2009
This essence of good communication is listening, isn’t it? Sometimes ‘people talk so loud, you cannot hear what they are saying.’
askcherlock´s last blog ..Women: Pawns in Health Care Debate?
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Walter Reply:
November 23rd, 2009 at 6:54 pm
You said it right. Without listening, communication bears no purpose.
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By Wilma Ham on November 20th, 2009
The power is with the listener.
When you listen you get information and knowledge, when you talk you are just emptying and already near empty mind.
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Walter Reply:
November 23rd, 2009 at 6:55 pm
Interesting thought Wilma. I will always remember this wisdom.
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By D. James Rice on November 20th, 2009
Walter,
You are right. As a fellow blogger just starting out I am learing that people hear you but don’t listen even when they are reading what you have written. Most just want to get their point accross with no regards for what you may think. Unfortunately, it will probably just get worse. Great blog.
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Walter Reply:
November 23rd, 2009 at 7:02 pm
I have the same kind of observation. Most people are indeed selfish in expressing themselves without any regard to the point of others.
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By Kaushik on November 20th, 2009
Listening is a natural easy skill made difficult by the busy mind. With awareness, listening returns easily.
Thanks for the pointer!
Kaushik´s last blog ..On gold-smuggling, refugees, and the strength of women
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Walter Reply:
November 24th, 2009 at 6:17 pm
I wonder why we had made listening difficult? Maybe because we don’t have patience anymore.
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By Tess The Bold Life on November 20th, 2009
As we enter the holiday season I will listen more and talk less. Thanks for the inspiration!
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Walter Reply:
November 24th, 2009 at 6:18 pm
Yes, this coming holiday is a season of giving. We might as well give our attention.
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By Gabe | freebloghelp.com on November 20th, 2009
We’ve created a bark loud society! Look at Twitter, for example. Lots of shouting and not too many are listening.
Gabe | freebloghelp.com´s last blog ..The 21st century corporate soapbox
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Walter Reply:
November 24th, 2009 at 6:21 pm
I have observe this fact on Twitter. But I have also observe that one will find something worthwhile if they care to listen between the words.
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By Ian | Quantum Learning on November 20th, 2009
Wonderful post Walter.
Actually I don’t think it’s universal .. I personally know many great listeners, probably because I tend to seek them out. But in the mainstream, it does seem that listening has become a lost art. I’m wondering if the rise of mass media (especially TV) has contributed to this. After all ‘the box’ talks and never listens and has become a feature of so many people’s lives.
Ian | Quantum Learning´s last blog ..24 Moments Of Peace
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Walter Reply:
November 24th, 2009 at 6:22 pm
Yes I agree, it is not universal. However, it is more like the norm of the present time.
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By Ryhen Satch on November 20th, 2009
It’s ok to talk, but indeed, it’s much better to listen. If you’re planning to listen more, however, just be careful. Some of the things you will hear might harm your mind. It’s important to remember what Buddha said if you’re going to make listening your new hobby, “Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.” Peace out! Ryhen
Ryhen Satch´s last blog ..Fear No Evil! Conquer Your Demons!
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Walter Reply:
November 25th, 2009 at 6:37 pm
The mind has harmed mankind for centuries. It has its own beliefs that we blindly follow, its formidable weapon is the emotions on which we are helpless to counter. However, if man listens very carefully, a voice higher than the mind beckons us to go beyond our minds. Once we do, we are no longer live a life of reaction.
The mind is a terrible master but an excellent slave.
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By John Rocheleau - Zen-Moments on November 20th, 2009
“Understanding” is the key to wisdom and living well with others, and understanding begins with listening.
We’ve all heard that expression “that’s why we have two ears and one mouth.” We should try to listen twice as much as we speak.
Beyond all the posturing, the useless words and violence of our world though, I see the beauty behind it all within everyone. Our potential is waiting to be triggered and empowered. We have a fabulous future ahead of us, but we must choose it every day and in every moment.
Reminding one another to listen more, to be truly attentive and aware of one another, is maybe the best way to ensure that we arrive at that future with integrity.
John
John Rocheleau – Zen-Moments´s last blog ..On Friendships and Secrets
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Walter Reply:
November 25th, 2009 at 6:31 pm
I agree with your thoughts here John. All of us has beauty within but few are able to realize this within themselves. The truth is always revealed in the present moment yet we never listen to it.
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By Sabrina on November 20th, 2009
Coming from a dating standpoint, I’ve wondered if the topic of listening should take place immediately after telling someone your name. We all get busy with other things while in relationships and, even though it can appear that the other person is intentionally not listening, that is not always the case. Many times, I believe we are in relationships with others that were never taught to communicate so asking them to listen isn’t fair. Either take on the roll of a teacher or leave the lesson for someone else. Otherwise, you’re trying to fit a round peg into a square hole.
It doesn’t do much for sexual attraction, in the beginning, but if we could listen more in the beginning of our relationships I think the bonds would be stronger or, at the very least, our “time served” would be lessened
. I’ve often kicked myself for not getting clarity on what I thought I heard and asking the other party to do the same.
How many relationships have we let go assuming the wrong thing? Many times, I think, we make interpretations based on who we are (the voice inside)and that has nothing to do with what was said.
Great post, Walter!
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Walter Reply:
November 26th, 2009 at 10:12 pm
From a dating standpoint, I believe that listening first will give you an edge. As you are in the process of listening, you can observe the person carefully, how he moves, how he talks, how he reacts, these are the physical messages you need to hear.
On the relationship level, listening can dissolve misunderstanding and unnecessary heartaches brought about by our noisy ego.
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By Rocky | ROCKONOVA.COM on November 20th, 2009
One of my favorite habits I’ve learned from Stephen Covey is Seek First To Understand, Then To Be Understood. I know I’ve been able to make a lot of challenging situations smoother just by slowing down and listening to what the other person is saying. It’s tough at times, but definitely effective.
Rocky | ROCKONOVA.COM´s last blog ..Radiohead – Street Spirit
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Walter Reply:
November 27th, 2009 at 5:27 pm
Covey has understood the importance of listening. Still, many does not understand the wisdom of being still and lend both ears.
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By Jon on November 20th, 2009
Walter. Thanks for the comment earlier and sorry it took so long for me to get back to you. As a new blogger, I guess I’m still beginning to understand this system of feedback. My personal stance is that if I have nothing of value to add, I remain silent and enjoy listening instead. In your case, I agreed that people often misunderstand blogging and think it is much easier than it really is. However, for me to say I agree after you said “I agree” might sound redundant, maybe?
Anyway, looks like you have a great community here and all the best.
-Jon
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Walter Reply:
November 27th, 2009 at 5:25 pm
I’m also new to blogging, actually its five moths old. Thanks Jon for visiting and sharing your thoughts.
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By Rose on November 20th, 2009
I’ve notice lately that many people have trouble with opinions that differ from theirs. Instead of debating the topic or accepting that we all have a right to our opinion they begin name calling. I’d like to think that I’m a good listener.
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Walter Reply:
November 28th, 2009 at 6:21 pm
I has been the habit of most people to label, they are too narrow to hear the view of others. It is good that you’re not among them.
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By Hesham @ FamousBloggers on November 20th, 2009
Thank you for pointing to this important matter in our lives, it’s very sensitive post Walter!
I always look to my self as a good listener all the time, specially now! I have to listen to everybody and everything around me as I don’t live anymore in my country, I have to move to a new place where people talk different and have backgrounds that far a way from mine!
And OH!, your post remind me also with something very funny about people, it happen when you meet with people talks in a different language than yours and you can not understand what they say, like Mexican, Indians or even Egyptians, when they talk you feel that everybody is talking at he same time, and you keep wondering who is listening ?!
I’s great to meet someone like you, and thanks a lot for visiting my blog!
Hesham @ FamousBloggers´s last blog ..The Cracked Mexican Roads Touched my Soul on my Visit to Monterrey Mexico last Weekend
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Walter Reply:
November 29th, 2009 at 3:39 pm
It’s good you have chose to listen. Being in a different country, listening is an advantage to gain understanding about their ways and beliefs.
Thanks Hesham for seeing you here.
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By Barbara Swafford on November 20th, 2009
Hi Walter,
Your post reminds me of the saying, “we have two ears and one mouth, therefore we should listen twice as much as we talk “(or something like that).
As the youngest of my siblings I learned to listen as they wouldn’t let me get a word in edgewise. Now, I’m happy it worked out that way as I learn tons from listening.
P.S. Congratulations on being named new blog of the week over at George’s blog. That’s a great honor.
Barbara Swafford´s last blog ..The Battle Over Comments – Part 2
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Walter Reply:
November 30th, 2009 at 7:08 am
You are one of my inspirations Barbara. Visiting your blog as always, I’ve learned a lot of things.
Thank you so much.
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By Jonny on November 20th, 2009
2 Ears 1 Mouth. Do the math right?
Jonny´s last blog ..Some Bad Ass Travel Tips To Let You Be A Smug Bar-stuard Even In The Company Of Seasoned Travelers – You Know You Are Going To Read This
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Walter Reply:
December 2nd, 2009 at 6:32 pm
Yup. This is a simple equation most people don’t understand.
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By Brad Edgar on November 20th, 2009
It is insane the way people are these days. I am definitely guilty of not listening to what people have to say. I think now a days we feel like we need to be heard in order to be successful. In order to be heard everybody feels like they need to say the things that they are thinking (regardless if somebody else is talking).
I’m practicing getting better and I think we all should.
Great post!
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Walter Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 5:19 pm
Most of us are unaware of our deafness. If we could catch this negative attitude then we will be able to understand more.
[Reply]
By Deep understanding | LionSlinger.com on November 20th, 2009
[...] Nobody wants to listen [...]
By Sire on November 20th, 2009
I realize that this is a serious post, and it is very well written, but I can’t help but to point out one thing regarding husbands not listening to wives. I know because I am accused of this all the time, but it’s not really my fault. I’ve told her on more than one occasion, that if she has something important to tell me, wait until a commercial.
Sire´s last blog ..Why I No Longer Link To The Likes Of ProBlogger And John Chow 
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Walter Reply:
December 5th, 2009 at 6:41 am
You are never alone on this Sire. I also had this same predicament. Still, we have to maximize our understanding. At least we did our best.
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By Lasting aspirations? | LionSlinger.com on November 20th, 2009
[...] Nobody wants to listen [...]
By Success eludes mediocrity | LionSlinger.com on November 20th, 2009
[...] Nobody wants to listen [...]
By DarrinW on November 20th, 2009
I think this phenomenon is only very obvious in blogging. Blogging is about getting your words out online and yes, I find many bloggers do not have much interest in listening. It’s more like me, me, and me.
DarrinW´s last blog ..Adding watermarks in Word 2007
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Walter Reply:
December 22nd, 2009 at 7:46 pm
Well, I must admit your point here. I have been guilty of this. Now, I make it sure that I’m being aware of the voice of others.
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By turisuna on November 20th, 2009
You are right, these days it’s more difficult to find someone who really wants to listen us. All people want to speak up without listening the others. And the worse is people often don’t realize if they have hurt someone else with their words.
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Walter Reply:
December 29th, 2009 at 4:23 am
I guess it is our nature to be selfish. Have you ever wondered why this world is full of fools? Unless we realize this error, harmony will be impossible.
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By Yun on November 20th, 2009
I like the perspectives you have on the common problem of ‘not listening’. For example: “Husband goes deaf in the form of stonewalling while wives go deaf with incessant complaints.” so well said…
My two cents are that as long as we are so self absorbed in our own minds chatter, listening to others is simply a concept. As the world spins faster, our mind chatters faster, that’s why the listening become more and more of an issue in the post modern world.
To counter the faster spinning world outside, silence and stillness practice is called for in my humble opinion, if we ought to have the capacity to really listen…
Again, you have an excellent way to present an old issue. Well done. Thank you.
Yun´s last blog ..Mid-Week Symphony: Sink or Swim
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Walter Reply:
January 28th, 2010 at 8:26 am
Most of us forget the wisdom behind silence. Such is an important virtue to gain understanding.
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By Therese Miu on November 20th, 2009
Hi Walter,
“How do I listen to others?
As if everyone were my master speaking to
me his cherished last words”
Hafiz
Therese Miu´s last blog ..12 Tips to strengthen your friendship: Why Likeability Matters in Life & Business
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Walter Reply:
February 12th, 2010 at 7:12 am
Now that’s a very good approach Therese.
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By Julius Kuhn-Regnier on November 20th, 2009
Love the article, Walter! I totally agree with you. Nobody in our daily life truly emphasizes the important practice of listening. I know I don’t listen very well that’s because whenever someone says something I project it back at me, and say something along the line “It happened to me too..”
But that is not what listening is about. Listening to someone isn’t about yourself, it’s about them.
Julius Kuhn-Regnier´s last blog ..The Lost Art of Failure
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Walter Reply:
February 12th, 2010 at 7:16 am
That’s the essence of listening Julius. We have to put ourselves on the background and put the speaker on the forefront.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
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By Matthew Dent on November 20th, 2009
Great post Walter! Listening is the most effective tool in communication. Why is it, we are taught to read and write but not to listen? We are expected to understand but never taught to listen… Master listening and you will create followers.
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Walter Reply:
February 18th, 2010 at 8:33 am
That’s very true Matthew, I just don’t understand why’s difficult for many to practice this simple virtue. Perhaps most have been selfish by only listening to their own.
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By Faizal on November 20th, 2009
Hey Walter, I think that sometimes people don’t want to listen because of their inner hunger to be right or feel powerful. When someone tries telling them something, they don’t accept it because they want things their way.
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Walter Reply:
February 19th, 2010 at 7:23 am
I agree with you on this Faizal. I call this attitude Ego.
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